Why We're Choosing a Natural, Unmedicated Birth

A decade before I got pregnant, I knew I wanted a natural birth. At first, my reason was superficial and a bit silly: I liked the idea of doing something challenging. I saw an unmedicated birth as akin to hiking Mt. Everest or winning a Pulitzer--something very challenging that not everyone is able to do.

When people began to tell me how stupid I was for considering a natural birth, my research began in earnest. That's when I realized that the value of a natural birth is much deeper than just surviving a challenge and showing people I could do something they think I cannot. Natural birth offers numerous health advantages, and it more neatly matches my feminist values.

My decision to have an unmedicated birth has been met with surprising pushback. A lot of people insist it is simply impossible, even though it's what millions of women have done for as long as there have been women. Others become immediately angry or defensive. There's a lot of judgment and blame in birth culture, and I suspect that guilt also plays a role. Women are taught that, no matter what they do as mothers, it's wrong. So when a woman hears my plans for a natural birth, she may see it as an attack on her own birth choices. Because so many women are deprived of any choice at all when they give birth, simply hearing about another woman's plans may trigger feelings of regret, victimization, and inadequacy.

I'm not going to defend my choices any more, and I'm not going to engage in arguments that make everyone involved feel terrible. Birth should be a happy event, not a feud over how best to birth a child. And really, my answer to queries about why I'm having a natural birth should end there: because I want to. Because it's my right. Because it's no one's god damn business.

Like the women who feel judged and shamed for their medicated births, I too often feel defensive. So here's why I'm choosing a natural birth.

What Does a Feminist Birth Look Like?

Feminism has a motherhood problem. Something about birthing a member of the next generation seems to exclude women from feminist discourse. Don't believe me? Consider the fact that women with young children are routinely asked to leave feminist events, that the child-free movement freely uses grossly sexist language without feminist corrections, and that many feminists continue to believe that staying home with children is not work.

Nowhere is this issue more prevalent than in the debate over birth. Home births have steadily increased over the past decade, yet this sudden surge in reproductive activism is hardly a blip on the feminist radar. When feminists do wade into the childbirth debate, it's usually to assert--with absolutely certainty--that there is only one correct way to birth a child. This dichotomous approach to parenting completely neglects the very real issues feminist mothers face, not to mention the stunning coercion and abuse women face when they give birth.

There is no single feminist way to give birth, but there is a feminist way to approach birth.